{"id":27,"date":"2006-07-15T08:41:39","date_gmt":"2006-07-15T14:41:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/quechilero.com\/blog\/2006\/07\/15\/para-nuestra-limonada\/"},"modified":"2006-07-15T08:41:39","modified_gmt":"2006-07-15T14:41:39","slug":"para-nuestra-limonada","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/quechilero.com\/blog\/2006\/07\/15\/para-nuestra-limonada\/","title":{"rendered":"Para nuestra limonada"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Limonada 1<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Un hombre que siempre molestaba a su mujer, pas\u00f3 un d\u00eda por la casa de unos amigos para que lo acompa\u00f1asen al aeropuerto a dejar a su esposa que viajaba a Paris.<\/p>\n<p>A la salida de inmigraci\u00f3n, frente a todo el mundo, \u00e9l le desea buen viaje y le grita :<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Amor, no te olvides de traerme una hermosa francesita.<\/p>\n<p>Ella baj\u00f3 la cabeza y se embarc\u00f3 muy molesta.<\/p>\n<p>La mujer pas\u00f3 quince d\u00edas en Francia. El marido otra vez pidi\u00f3 a sus amigos que lo acompa\u00f1asen al aeropuerto a recibirla. Al verla llegar, lo primero que le grita a toda voz :<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><br \/>\n&#8211; Y amor \u00bfme trajiste mi francesita?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Hice lo posible, ahora tenemos que rezar para que nazca ni\u00f1ita.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Limonada 2<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Paseando por la playa, la esposa le pide al marido que le compre un bikini. El le contesta:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Con este cuerpo de m\u00e1quina lavadora, ni pensarlo.<\/p>\n<p>Siguen caminando y ella insiste:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Entonces c\u00f3mprame un vestido.<\/p>\n<p>Y \u00e9l le responde:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Con este cuerpo de m\u00e1quina lavadora, ni pensarlo.<\/p>\n<p>En la noche, ya en la cama, el marido se da vuelta hacia su mujer y le pregunta:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; \u00bfQu\u00e9 te parece si echamos a andar esta m\u00e1quina lavadora?<\/p>\n<p>Y la mujer, con desprecio, le contesta:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; \u00bfPara la lavar este trapito? L\u00e1valo a mano que da menos trabajo.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Limonada 3<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Una viejita pregunta a su marido moribundo:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Muy bien, despu\u00e9s de 40 a\u00f1os de casados, s\u00e1came de una curiosidad \u00bfme has enga\u00f1ado alguna vez?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Si querida, una sola vez. \u00bfRecuerdas la secretaria que ten\u00eda cuando trabajaba en la f\u00e1brica, Margarita se llamaba?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Si, la recuerdo.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Pues este cuerpo fue todito m\u00edo.<\/p>\n<p>Segundos despu\u00e9s, \u00e9l le pregunta:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; \u00bfY t\u00fa, viejita, me has enga\u00f1ado alguna vez?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; S\u00ed mi viejito, una sola vez. \u00bfrecuerdas cuando viv\u00edamos frente al Cuerpo de Bomberos?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; S\u00ed me acuerdo. Contesta el moribundo.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Pues aquel Cuerpo fue todito m\u00edo.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Limonada 4<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>El marido, en su lecho de muerte, llama a su mujer. Con voz ronca y ya d\u00e9bil, le dice:<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Muy bien, lleg\u00f3 mi hora, pero antes quiero hacerte una confesi\u00f3n.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; No, no, tranquilo, tu no debes hacer ning\u00fan esfuerzo.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Pero, mujer, es preciso. &#8211; insiste el marido &#8211; Es preciso morir en paz.. Te quiero confesar algo.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Est\u00e1 bien, est\u00e1 bien. \u00a1Habla!<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; He tenido relaciones con tu hermana, tu mam\u00e1 y tu mejor amiga.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; Lo s\u00e9, lo s\u00e9, y no te preocupes &#8211; le dice la mujer &#8211; Pero yo tambi\u00e9n te quiero confesar algo. \u00bfRecuerdas que el m\u00e9dico dijo que cre\u00eda que alguien hab\u00eda puesto ars\u00e9nico en tu comida?<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; S\u00ed, mujer, lo recuerdo.<\/p>\n<p>&#8211; \u00a1Pues ten\u00eda raz\u00f3n!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Limonada 1 Un hombre que siempre molestaba a su mujer, pas\u00f3 un d\u00eda por la casa de unos amigos para que lo acompa\u00f1asen al aeropuerto a dejar a su esposa que viajaba a Paris. A la salida de inmigraci\u00f3n, frente a todo el mundo, \u00e9l le desea buen viaje y le grita : &#8211; Amor, &#8230; <a title=\"Para nuestra limonada\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/quechilero.com\/blog\/2006\/07\/15\/para-nuestra-limonada\/\" aria-label=\"Leer m\u00e1s sobre Para nuestra limonada\">Leer m\u00e1s<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","filesize_raw":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2],"tags":[11,15,48,49,18,19,50,20,40,36],"series":[],"class_list":["post-27","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-limones","tag-amigo","tag-amor","tag-curiosidad","tag-esfuerzo","tag-hombre","tag-limonada","tag-muerte","tag-mujer","tag-paz","tag-trabajo"],"episode_featured_image":false,"episode_player_image":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/quechilero.com\/blog\/imagenes\/podcast.png?fit=1831%2C1831&ssl=1","download_link":"","player_link":"","audio_player":false,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"dark","subscribeUrls":{"amazon":{"key":"amazon","url":"","label":"Amazon","class":"amazon","icon":"amazon.png"},"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"castbox":{"key":"castbox","url":"","label":"CastBox","class":"castbox","icon":"castbox.png"},"deezer":{"key":"deezer","url":"","label":"Deezer","class":"deezer","icon":"deezer.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"listen_notes":{"key":"listen_notes","url":"","label":"Listen Notes","class":"listen_notes","icon":"listen-notes.png"},"pandora":{"key":"pandora","url":"","label":"Pandora","class":"pandora","icon":"pandora.png"},"podbean":{"key":"podbean","url":"","label":"Podbean","class":"podbean","icon":"podbean.png"},"podcast_republic":{"key":"podcast_republic","url":"","label":"Podcast Republic","class":"podcast_republic","icon":"podcast-republic.png"},"rss":{"key":"rss","url":"","label":"RSS","class":"rss","icon":"rss.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"stitcher":{"key":"stitcher","url":"","label":"Stitcher","class":"stitcher","icon":"stitcher.png"},"tunein":{"key":"tunein","url":"","label":"TuneIn","class":"tunein","icon":"tunein.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"},"iheartradio":{"key":"iheartradio","url":"","label":"iHeartRadio","class":"iheartradio","icon":"iheartradio.png"},"ivoox":{"key":"ivoox","url":"","label":"iVoox","class":"ivoox","icon":"ivoox.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/quechilero.com\/blog\/feed\/podcast\/si-la-vida-nos-da-limones","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"hKRvgPzYhc\"><a href=\"https:\/\/quechilero.com\/blog\/2006\/07\/15\/para-nuestra-limonada\/\">Para nuestra limonada<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/quechilero.com\/blog\/2006\/07\/15\/para-nuestra-limonada\/embed\/#?secret=hKRvgPzYhc\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"\u00abPara nuestra limonada\u00bb \u2014 Si la Vida nos da Limones...\" data-secret=\"hKRvgPzYhc\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! 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